2012

Well...so far...this year is not a whole lot different than the last. My first words of 2012 were "Thank fucking god that's over", meaning 2011. Then I thought about it and realized that some really awesome things have happened in past years, but as a whole, they progressively get more shitty.

2009 was graduation. Which was awesome. However, this is the year that I went throught the worst heartbreaking break up ever. And it's still a part of my daily functions sometimes. He is also still an ass hole and rude to my husband. Gah. It ended with a new relationship and an embryo.

2010 started with the loss of said embryo. Great way to start it. Not. 2010 I got married. Things were startin to look up. Then we found out there was a baby coming! It ended with me being pissed off at the world and fat. a.k.a pregnant.

2011 started awesome. I felt awesome, I looked pregnant, not just like a whale, and we were having a good life. We bought a house and things were great. Then Will was born. That was a complete awesome and shitty moment all at once. Awesome he was here, shitty he was here 3 months early and I almost died. Not exaggerating. Then Will died. It was all consuming for the remainder of the year. I ended the year with a massive head cold so hopped up on cold medicined I couldn't have a conversation.

So, how did 2012 start? With a broken fridge. I have very little hope for this year getting better. I have very little hope that this year won't bring the worst things yet. I do have hope though, that it will bring some amazing moments and memories along with that bad, just like the previous years.

Only time will tell if the pattern with keep going, or if 2012 will actually be the best year yet.